Romantic relationships can face many obstacles: other people’s opinions, the amount of time you can dedicate to one another, and sometimes, like for me, 10,500-odd miles between the two of you - yup, home is farrrrr from Sydney. However, in the current times of Coronavirus, if you’re following the UK government advice, it may be a lot smaller a distance and can be just as an adaption.
Whether your love story began in the ‘traditional’ sense – face to face – or blossomed online, long-distance relationships can be pretty tough, but here are a few things you can do to give your partnership the best chance of going the distance (pun intended).
Good old-fashioned mail
Long-distance relationships aren’t a new thing; in history, many star-crossed lovers were torn apart by distance, be it for military, family, or other reasons. Our forefathers and mothers survived, so take inspiration and get down the postie pronto! There is something about receiving a handwritten note, postcard or surprise flowers that feels more personal than its virtual counterparts, and it’s a nice way to give your other half an unexpected pick-me-up, letting them know you are thinking of them.
Make use of technology
However, unlike previous generations, we are lucky to have a plethora of technology and instant communication devices to hand. Phone calls, video calls and voice notes are all great ways to replicate normal face-to-face conversation. Make shared Spotify playlists with songs reminiscent of times you’ve spent together. You can even take it a step further and set up virtual dates, such as watching the same film or having a meal simultaneously, or going to a similar place in your respective town or country (once this epidemic is over, of course). The butterflies will come and sparks will fly as they do on normal face-to-face dates.
In a trusting, consensual relationship, there is no need to let that other spark go either, thanks to technology. Just be sure you’re totally comfortable and fully trust your partner, because as many Hollywood scandals have shown, once photos, videos or messages are out there, they are out there.
Rely on the other person
Being in a relationship means you are a partnership, and this shouldn’t change just because you’re apart. It feels good to know your boyfriend or girlfriend values your opinion, so ask their advice on issues and unload the mundane thoughts too, just as you would if you were cuddled at the end of the day. What’s more, you can approach big decisions as a couple, bringing your individual experiences and outlooks together to make an informed choice.
Try not to compare
This can be easier said than done, especially if you’re surrounded by loved-up couples day-to-day. It can sometimes be even harder when your relationship started as non-long-distance, and these other couples conjure up memories of your easier times. However, just as if your partner was with you day-to-day, every couple is different and you can’t always see the obstacles other couples are facing behind closed doors. And remember, your relationship may even end up stronger for having had this test that many couples don’t face. Moreover, while daily communication may work for some long-distance couples, a long weekly video call may be more your bag.
Have an end goal
This one can be a little harder in some cases, more so now than ever in this uncertain time, but where possible, try and have a date in mind for when you can next be together in person. This could be your next couple’s holiday, when you’ll next visit one another, or when you’ll finally move to the same place. This gives you both a focus and makes the struggles of a long-distance relationship seem less permanent; hardships are a lot easier to weather when you know they’re not forever.
